Being a ‘driven’ woman in my career and as a mom and wife, I have seen days so full, the only way through was to push, force and not think of anything but the jobs ahead. As I got past 45, that ‘drive’ seemed to shrink when I needed it the most. Eventually the capacity to push, drive and ‘make’ things happen shriveled up and totally disappeared.
What was wrong with me?
I had things to do, people’s lives to touch and life was passing me by!
Ever felt that way? I’ve learned some keys that I would like to share with you. These keys are lost in our hurry-up, driven society and especially hidden to most women. Activating any one of these keys can change your life forever! Each one has made a difference in my life!
To make sure we are on the same page, let’s define ‘overwhelm’ – – it means to have too many things on our plate and/or feel completely defeated. Does that ‘full plate syndrome’ sound familiar? Then let’s change it!
Key #1 Love Yourself
My favorite scripture is when the Pharisees asked Jesus – – “What are the most important commandments?” He responded with “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and love your neighbor AS yourself.” God’s order is Him, you, and then others. As we receive His love and then learn to love ourselves, we can THEN (and only then) love others in a healthy way instead of a ‘fix it – manipulate it – give out of obligation/should and DEBT’ mode!
In working with tens of thousands of clients over 20 years, I’ve found most women, take care of everyone else, squeeze in God and totally forget themselves! This is out of order and we can’t get past overwhelm when our life is out of order!
It is not only ok to take care of you – – – it is how God planned it! Giving yourself permission to take care of you, without guilt, will change your life forever!
Key #2 Let go of ‘shoulds’!
A should is an obligation, which is a debt, which is the opposite of abundance and prospering. The best question I have learned to ask in any situation is “Lord, what is my role in this situation?”
For years I just jumped in and did everything I thought ‘should’ be done. Many times (ok, most of the time) it had nothing to do with what God was asking me to do. Recognizing what ‘my role is’ in a season has fit like hand-in-glove with learning to take care of myself.
When I hear myself say, “I should” do this, I know I’m missing something. I stop, breathe and ask God “What is my role?” Many times the response is very different from my default action.
Understanding and applying these two simple keys has changed my life, marriage, relationship with my daughter, my weight and how I work with clients. Life is easier and I have discovered a FREEDOM of great value.
Overwhelm simply lets you know when you are off course, when you are not taking care of you and trying to juggle too many ‘shoulds’! It is possible to change and the freedom on the other side is so worth the choice to change!
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